A RELEVANT One Week Rush

The last couple weeks have been rather interesting. My thoughts seem almost clear, but not quite clear enough. My heart is catching on fire, but I don't have words to describe it yet. My soul is longing for something more, but I know what that something is and have ignored it.

I'm coming alive again.

I'm realizing I should occasionally read my own blog. It might help when I feel the life leaving me, the fire and passion for Love itself, the clarity of purpose.

The last two weeks brought these things to my attention through conversation, "wasting" time, the internet, and movies. After this small journey (which is really representative of a much longer one), I would like to welcome myself back to Life.

A friend of mine is having a rough time. She is also on the ride of her life. I've learned this is typical of someone who is letting down walls and letting God break in. It's painful and beautiful to watch, a true blessing to be able to witness the glory of God. It's reminded me of why I'm here and why I have nothing to be angry about and everything to be thankful for.

Last week, on a whim and following a feeling, I left and didn't tell anyone where I went. I grabbed my book and money and drove to a coffee shop where I relaxed for 2 1/2 hours, enjoying soup, crackers, a bagel, tea, my book, and the sunshine. I realized I forgot how to "waste" time.

RELEVANT is a magazine whose tagline is, "God. Life. Progressive Culture." A recent article called "11 Things to Know at 25(ish)" rekindled many thoughts and beliefs that already cemented somewhere deep in my heart. I feel 22 years old again, and that's a good feeling.

Two nights ago, I discovered the movie One Week. I don't know when it came out, don't remember the actor's name, and don't know who made it. All I know is that it spoke directly to the core of being because someone else finally articulated what I have felt and believed all along. If the things I write here don't quite make sense to you, watch that movie. It's free and instant on Netflix.

Last night, I watched August Rush for the second time in my life. For some reason I remember it being "not quite as good as I thought it would be." I was in the mood for a good movie, a little deep but not too much, a good soundtrack... The movie blew my mind. August Rush is exponentially better than I remember, probably because I actually understand what it means now. And I just love the way art and beauty change you because they are transcendent...

I hope and pray for your own RELEVANT one week rush. Because mine was awesome.

I'm alive again.

Contemplate.

Don't ever get too busy to forget to contemplate.

Reorient yourself on the present. Redirect yourself towards your goal. Recommit yourself to excellence. Rediscover being ALIVE.

"Be still and know that I am God."
Psalm 46:10

Encounter.

From the new post on my other blog:


I’ve realized something very simple in the last week:

Many people don’t do things because they think they can’t, not because they don’t want to. Sometimes, the only encouraging words someone needs are, “Youcan.” I would like to take that further, of course, and say that more often than not those words need to be followed by, “…only in Christ.”

Have you ever felt completely stuck? Like you’re trying your best to change, to make a difference, to do better, to love more, to work harder…but you just can’t?

Well, I’m going to guess that you’re trying to do it without God.

So take a minute. Sit in silence. Turn off the music, the TV, close this window in your browser and just BE. You want to change? Then let the Lord do it. You want to hear His voice? Then harden not your hearts and allow Him to speak and break through the noise and clutter and distractions of this life, of your heart. Allow Christ to draw you deeper into his most Sacred Heart and show you how to love and be loved! He may be our God, but he is our God who took on flesh, became human, for us. For you. If you were the only person on earth, he would come and die for you again. And again. He loves us that much, individually. He desires a relationship with us, and that relationship is an encounter with not just a god but with a person.

That encounter with the person of Jesus Christ, our God and Savior, necessarily changes and transforms us in the depths of our being. That’s where true freedom lies.

So all those things you want do? All those things you want to change? Do them. Change them. And encourage others!

In Christ.

Heavenly Father, transform our wills and desires to Yours.

How Do You Poke The Box? (Pt. I)

So I'm reading a new book out by author and blogger Seth Godin called "Poke the Box." He speaks about initiating projects rather than just thinking of ideas and reacting - poking the box.

It's a concise, inspiring book that is quick to read. It motivates and encourages that inner part of you that wants to do something worth doing, that wants to change something worth changing...

It's a book that nudges your heart a little, your heart that's wanting to come alive in a new and real way.

Poke the box.

Heaven Come Down

We stood in the dark, our feet in the cool sand. Bundled in sweatshirts though it was the middle of the summer, both of us stayed silent, listening to the breeze and the crashing waves.

"I love the beach at night," I said to my sister.
"Me too. It reminds me of heaven."

I looked at her, looked back out at the ocean, trying to make out the dark horizon line, and agreed.

"Yeah..."

We stayed at the edge of the water as long as we could before being beckoned back to the bonfire. In that moment, I became acutely aware of the vast beauty surrounding me, and I am comforted as I think of it from time to time. I began reflecting on why the beach at night is like heaven. An obvious initial response might be that all of creation reflects God, but I believe the metaphor goes deeper.

When looking out at the ocean, its expanse is too far for the eye to see. We can hardly even fathom that by going all the way out there into the unknown we would find land again. This experience is heightened at night, and I can't help but imagine the glory of God and how we can only get a taste of it! We know all too well the struggle in trust it takes to live life as a fully committed Christian, but think about this -- who really wants to stay on the beach? As hard as it is, if asked by someone "Do you want to continue doing the same thing or trust in the GOD of creation and experience the absolutely new?" which would you choose?

I like thinking there is someone so much greater than myself because honestly, I kinda suck sometimes. And that's an understatement...So I think I'm going to work on trusting that someone a little more.

Which is NEW for me...

It's A Beautiful Life

It crazy to think of how terrified I am to truly fall in love.

It will change me and my life forever, yet that's exactly what we all crave, right? The daring, the new. Despite how much we believe we hate change, we desperately want the thrill and satisfaction of encountering the new, the unknown, and embracing it, facing it.

Falling in love is terrifying, but so is waking up tomorrow and living the same routine of today. I could throw my heart away to be broken and shattered, but I could also never let anyone love me, move me, change me. I can't like myself that much that I don't want to be any different! And I can't hate myself that much that I become obsessed with change. Why not listen to God and allow him to place beautiful people in my life?

Come ALIVE!

With a renewed sense of purpose, I have completely redesigned my blog!

Through some reflection that resulted from solitude and sickness, I have realized that being encouraging and being encouraged do not just help us become more positive, they literally help us come ALIVE.

Hence, the rebirth of this blog.

So step out of yourself -- out of misery, despair, distraction, sorrow, apathy, narcissism, mediocrity -- and discover your true self. Experience the freedom in truly coming alive.


Follow me on Twitter (@EPSmits), follow my blog, email my posts, friend me on Facebook -- whatever you want to help you constantly remember the freedom in being alive.

F&M III: Social Media

Everyone reading this is actively using social media. Most of you have clicked on this from your own social media platform (i.e. Facebook, Blogger, etc.), but have we really thought about this idea of social media? Have we accurately and effectively gaged the impact and proper use of it?

In my last post, I discussed the idea of being easily distracted from God's will by morally neutral things in life like Facebook. But it goes deeper. This isn't about not overusing media -- it's about how we use it. It's not enough to say that you don't put up questionable pictures on your Facebook. What do you put in your statuses? What videos and links do you post on people's walls? What types of comments do you leave on pictures? Which pages do you "like" and applications do you use?

I have recently come to understand a little better how truly radical the Gospel is. I guess I never noticed it as much because I grew up Catholic. The Bible and its stories constantly surrounded me, and Jesus' teachings were always told to me. Being Catholic, we are catechized and taught the Bible almost without knowing it -- the liturgy of the Mass, memorized prayers, repetitious responses, etc. It's always been part of my way of life, but when the Gospel is truly and fully lived, people notice. People change. It's different. It's radical.

This summer I realized that I'm tired of pretending like I'm not really living a radically Christian life. I'm exhausted every time I go home and try so hard to hang out with my friends without rubbing anyone the wrong way, without letting them forget that I was a public school kid my whole life like them, without doing anything that convinces them I've changed into a "prude," without doing too many obviously Christian/Catholic things when they're around so as to avoid any potential tension. The fact is, I am different. I don't care about the same things anymore. I don't find the same things funny. I only buy Christian music. I do think about Christ constantly. I do read almost only spiritual books. I am deciding my life based on faith. I am living radically.

So back to social media. Pope Benedict XVI worded its benefits beautifully in his Message for the 43rd World Communications Day. I strongly suggest reading all of it, but the section that pertains particularly to my points here is this:

In this light, reflecting on the significance of the new technologies, it is important to focus not just on their undoubted capacity to foster contact between people, but on the quality of the content that is put into circulation using these means. I would encourage all people of good will who are active in the emerging environment of digital communication to commit themselves to promoting a culture of respect, dialogue and friendship.

Now, we can take this alone and implement it quite decently in our lives, in our use of media. That is fine.
Or we can take this and make it completely inseparable from the radical call of the Gospel. We can understand that everything we think, say and do is an integral part our salvation, of our universal call to holiness.

That random photo comment we post on Facebook suddenly becomes that much more important...

F&M II: Attentiveness in the Light of Faith

NOTE: Unfortunately my internet access is extremely sporadic right now so my posts will continue to be sparse for a couple weeks, but I will do my best...


Attentiveness.

I will be the first admit that I am somewhat of a distracted person, and let's be honest - if our spiritual life is not exactly "up to par" for the time being, prayer time is the first place where distractions hit.

However, in recent Gospel readings (the exact day/reading is TBA...I forget right now haha), we are called as Christians to a higher discipline in which we are constantly living in the Light of Christ, in his Truth. Always striving for the "narrow gate," it is imperative that we practice the renewal of our minds (Romans) in order that we can truly live in that Light through faith. This calls for a sort of spiritual attentiveness in which we are aware of God's presence and will in our lives.

This is critical because we live in a media-saturated society that makes it almost impossible to escape the influence of media messages. Regardless of their form, media become most dangerous in their "distracting" effect on our minds - our self-awareness and our God-awareness. It takes great discipline to go on the internet and do ONLY what you have to do, what you intended to, yet we must practice the disciplines of prudence and moderation.

Though it may be challenging, we should not find it wrong or offensive or "not a big deal." Food is intrinsically necessary for our survival, yet even in that we are called to moderation. If it is something we Christians must practice even with food, then how much more so are we called to it in our other activities like media?

F&M I: Unprecedented Possibilities

"Modern technology places at our disposal unprecedented possibilities for good, for spreading the truth of our salvation in Jesus Christ and for fostering harmony and reconciliation. Yet its misuse can do untold harm, giving rise to misunderstanding, prejudice and even conflict" (39th World Communications Day, Pope John Paul II).

I believe that it's become strikingly obvious that the misuse of media can have a negative impact on society and the world, as noted in the second half of this quote. We've seen a rapid increase in immorality, the acceptance of it, and even the promotion of it in the name of "freedom." Security and privacy have become issues as more and more information is provided and asked for online. Sex is not treated as sacred, is equated with love, and is constantly the subject of all forms of media, desensitizing the human mind and eye to what should be left private and a mystery.

The "unprecedented possibilities for good" seem to be harder to actualize. However, we have a tendency to see only the bad, the taboo, the emotional. In the same World Communications Day message, JPII says:

"The media can teach billions of people about other parts of the world and other cultures. With good reason they have been called 'the first Aeropagus of the modern age...for many the chief means of information and education, of guidance and inspiration in their behavior as individuals, families, and within society at large' (Redemptoris Missio, 37). Accurate knowledge promotes understanding, dispels prejudice, and awakens the desire to learn more. Images especially have the power to convey lasting impressions and to shape attitudes. They teach people how to regard members of other groups and nations, subtly influencing whether they are considered as friends or enemies, allies or potential adversaries" (2).

This gives us a huge task, a giant and honorable responsibility. Is it sometimes easy to shy away from the particularly repulsive media? Yes. What about the not-so-repulsive-but-probably-still-not-good? Ehh, a little harder. But our responsibility as Christians goes beyond not doing things. Just as Christ did not banish the old law but fulfilled it, explaining that we are still to keep the commandments but also LOVE God and one another, so also does our responsibility lie not just in avoiding bad media but in actively using it for the glory of God.

It is absolutely imperative that we are aware of what we listen to. This is probably one of the most important points to make because it is easier to recognize pornographic sex scenes in a movie than it is to really listen to what the rappers are rapping. The overused line "I don't listen to they lyrics, only the music" is getting a little old, and frankly, it isn't true. What goes into our minds affects our hearts, and what's in our hearts comes out of our mouths. It's a cycle, and as we positively change our media intake we will find our hearts softened to living a life full of God's grace. Likewise, if we consistently compromise our consciences our hearts will harden and we will lose our ability to see and follow the light of Christ.

The living Word of God is the single most important object of our desire. Christ alone feeds us with the bread from heaven, and our intake of his Word, his body, and his Spirit will transform our hearts and lead us to "go and make disciples of all nations" with the unprecedented possibilities of mass communications at our fingertips.

Faith & Media

Over the course of the next 4 months, I will write a series on "Faith & Media." So far, I have used this as a personal blog/journal to talk about spiritual matters, but I believe we need to acknowledge the significant impact of our media culture and face its implications head-on.

As Christians, we are called to read the "signs of the times" and "go and preach to all nations." Now more than ever we have a vast number of means by which we can do this, but (as in every culture of every age) we must be effective communicators and see through the eyes of God. This means being both media literate and entirely detached, knowledgeable of the faith and nonjudgmental of others, defenders of Truth and keepers of the peace.

My purpose is not to condemn media or to command that Jesus' name be preached in every Facebook status or Twitter update. I do, however, intend to hopefully foster a more well-rounded, universal understanding of the media -- its purpose, drawbacks, opportunities, triumphs, and failures -- illuminated by the Light and Truth of our world, the Savior Jesus Christ.

We have the advantage of growing up in this culture in that our generation is the most able to answer this call. However, that requires us to take action -- to know, to use, and to change the media.

In addition to these entries, I will add more pages to include references, news updates, and other information.

On The Subject Of God...

"God" is not a subject.

I heard a nun once say, "When I was with my family one time, we were talking about God, and my godfather said, 'Is God the only subject we can talk about here?' So I looked at him and said, 'God is not a subject, He's a person!'"

I think the nun has a point. But I would like to take that point further.

God is indeed a person, but He is more than that because He is God. He is the Creator of the universe, the Alpha and the Omega, the all-powerful, all-knowing, all-merciful, loving God whose very presence permeates our entire world.

The nun's godfather didn't just miss the point about God being a person, but he missed the point that we cannot compartmentalize God into a "subject" because our entire existence is dependent on Him, our entire experience is affected by Him, and everything in this universe points towards Him.

God is, in fact, the only "subject" that really matters.

God Of All Encouragement

From January 1 to July 1, as my 2010 New Year's Resolution, I kept another blog called "Betraying Bitter Betty." I was testing a hypothesis of mine that if we began doing something as simple as encouraging each other, the world would be a little more likable. My goal was to "betray the Bitter Betty inside all of us" and truthfully encourage at least one person per day for 6 months.

This turned out to be a hard but exciting challenge that literally changed the way I live. I do not feel as though this challenge has "finished" or "resolved," but rather it has led me to a greater realization of just how important and significant that challenge is.

Now, according to the NAB version, 2 Corinthians 1:3-7 says:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and God of all encouragement, who encourages us in our every affliction, so that we may be able to encourage those who are in any affliction with the encouragement with which we ourselves are encouraged by God. For as Christ's sufferings overflow to us, so through Christ does our encouragement flow. If we are afflicted, it is for your encouragement and salvation; if we are encouraged, it is for your encouragement, which enables you to endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is firm, for we know that as you share in the sufferings, you also share in the encouragement.

For Lent, our household gave up sarcasm and complaining, resulting in probably one of the hardest yet fruitful Lents in my lifetime. Fortunately for me, this coincided within my New Year's Resolution time frame, thus giving me extra encouragement (and accountability) to encourage...and not be negative.

Coming home for the summer has been really difficult. If there's one big difference that has come from my resolution, it's that I feel almost hypersensitive to negativity. I find myself being dragged against my will back into old behaviors and habits of slicing sarcasm and frustrated arguments with the family. Of course, though it's against my will, I do have the choice not to give in...I just feel the negative environment seems to weaken my will.

To be honest, I don't really know what to do. Trying to stay positive is an obvious effort, but what about practical ways to do that? Still working on it...

If I come up with something, I'll let you know.

Meanwhile, I encourage you to be encouraging. It really does more than we might think on the surface...After all, if God is the God of all encouragement, it necessarily follows that we would strive to imitate that and be God's people of encouragement -- not of judgment, hatred, condescension, or despair.

Love Is Real, Love Is Here

My good friend Alissa inspires me.

In fact, she has inspired me since I met her exactly 2 years and 10 months ago.

You see, 2 years and 10 months ago, I was fine. I loved my life and I was excited to be at college in Ohio, away from where I would have been in California.

But 2 years and 8 months ago, I was not fine. Within 2 months I reached a very sad and dark place in my life, much to the disappointment of myself. I didn't understand, well, anything really. While my insides seemed to be consumed by hurt, pain, suffering, confusion, anger, resentment, unforgiveness, self-hatred, shame, guilt (the list goes on), there was this shining beacon of light whom I knew as Alissa.

There were many such beacons of light, but this one was different. Alissa was different. Her light radiated outward like many of the others, except that hers also radiated to me. She wasn't just a light, she was light to me. I was gradually becoming acutely aware of the stark contrast between the abyss of what my life had become and the radiant joy that was right next to me. I lived with these beacons of light, with these people who lived a different life, yet I was unable to leave mine no matter how hard I tried or how badly I wanted it.

Then, 2 years and 5 months ago, after the longest 3 months of my entire life, I painfully and desperately tried to grab some light of my own.

Alissa was there, radiating her light still. Sometimes I would see her so exhausted and tired, but never too tired to stop radiating that light. I was so intrigued by this but so thankful because I didn't have time to wonder or care if she was tired or exhausted -- I needed that light so that I didn't slip back into darkness.

It wasn't until 1 year and 8 months ago that I began to see the darkness that I was in. How, you ask? Because I was so immersed in it that I could only vaguely sense it. However, I could vividly perceive where I was not, which is where Alissa was. Well, she had graduated months before and I didn't see her for several more. But suddenly, I realized I was no longer suffocating in darkness (without ever knowing I was, confusing I know) because then I was so far removed that I had a much clearer vision.

Without having seen Alissa for almost a year, it hit me one day -- I realized what a beacon of light she was. I could say that I knew that, that I noticed, but I didn't really. I was still too caught up in myself. Like I said, there wasn't really time to pay much attention.

Overwhelmed with thanksgiving and love, I can now tell you, 2 years and 10 months later, why she was and is a shining beacon of light that continues to inspire me, even to this day.

She was, and is, my friend.

I know that she knew I was stuck. Most people probably did. But she shined greater than anyone else because she didn't tell me I was stuck. She didn't act like I was different or living an unacceptable life with unacceptable people. She was my friend, and all she did was love me. The love she showed was so drastically opposed to the love I was NOT shown that I could not help but notice and desire to be free from everything else holding me down.

My faith is no secret, so I find it safe to say that Satan was after my soul. He wanted me so bad. And guess what? He lost. Epic failure. Alissa had screamed a resounding YES! to God before we met, though sometimes it was probably a weak, reluctant one. But little did she know that as she kept saying that yes, that disciplined, obedient yes every day, God was winning the victory over my heart and soul. If it weren't for her saying yes to HIM, then I would not be here. I don't where I would be, but it probably wouldn't be here.

So I have been thinking about how much I miss her. But no matter how much I do, she still inspires me anyway. We go months without talking, but when we do I am always overwhelmed with gratitude that she would see me through the eyes of God and do nothing more than be my friend.

This very long, quite personal entry is merely to culminate in this point:

Who's to say we are not this person for someone? We do not forget those who change our lives with small acts of kindness, so who's to say that we haven't done the same? And if we are having a hard time, well, that's life. But maybe there is someone who only knows hard times and doesn't need to be convinced. Maybe that person needs to know that even in those times, there is hope. We still have a choice. We still shape our character. Maybe they need to know that discipline is possible, that we are not ruled by emotions or instincts.

Perhaps they need to know that love is real. And if you show them that...well you just might change someone's life.

Real love is unconditional. Real love is a habit. And yes, that means it's a choice.

Make the choice.

Oh and P.S. -- Alissa is the same Alissa as the one mentioned on the right. She writes one of the most passionate and well-written blogs that I follow. Read it.

Extraordinary...

I believe that inside each of us is a strong desire to do something great with our lives, to follow ideals, to refuse the heavy weight of mediocrity, to courageously commit ourselves to humbly and patiently improve ourselves and society, making the world more human.

Never let that small flame burn out.

But remember that life is ordinary. It is in love and beauty that we find the extraordinary, which makes me think -- if we constantly love and constantly see the beauty that surrounds us, have we not then made the extraordinary in our lives the ordinary? What a thought, to think that that's possible...

Doing something great and following ideals doesn't necessarily include being widely known for it. However, it does mean that you have greatly persevered and succeeded in whatever state of life you are in. Make the extraordinary the ordinary.